You can see my version here on my blog.
A report by John Jackson
“Who’s to
say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now?”
- John Lennon
Matt Gilgenbach’s work is the stuff of nightmares, HIS nightmares.
Matt battles with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and depression constantly.
His mind conjures images of self-infliction and bodily harm due to his
condition. Thankfully, Matt is able to diminish his affliction through therapy
and the use of medicine.
Matt’s doesn’t let his condition to affect his love of
games. Last year, Matt broke into the indie game market with his work on Retro/Grade.
Retro/Grade is a
unique shooter/rhythm game with the tagline “Undestroy the Universe.” Players
were tasked with piloting a ship as it travels backwards in time to undo the
damage done by “un-firing” your attacks and dodging enemies. Retro/Grade was praised by numerous
critics despite low sales for its unique gameplay, music, and colorful art
style.
Undiscouraged, Matt created Infinititap Games and started
working on a new game based on his experiences with OCD. The game, titled “Neverending Nightmares,” tells the story
of Adam as he explores a mansion filled with ghouls and monsters.
Players will immediately notice a similarity to Amnesia: The Dark Decent. What sets Nightmares apart from many horror titles
is how it distances itself from traditional horror game traditions such as
weapons and puzzles. Infinititaps instead chose to focus on immersing the
players in the game through the art style, soundtrack and survival gameplay.
Players will have to flee from enemies if they want to survive the mansion and
will need to find hiding places to avoid contact.
Neverending Nightmares
is set to deliver a unique experience in the survival horror genre.
I was able to contact Matt and ask him some questions
regarding his new game
Q:
Who is the main character?
A: Matt: His name is Adam, but we haven’t revealed anything else
about him.
Why
is he in a mansion filled with grotesque creatures and creepy dead girls?
The game begins with Adam waking up from a nightmare, and soon
he realizes that he is in yet another nightmare. He continues to have false
awakenings into different nightmares until the ending reveals what aspects of
the nightmare are “real” and what are manifestations of his psychological
state.
What
does your game focus on? Puzzles? Action? Survival?
Exploration.
What
kind of gameplay can we expect? Is this an action horror game like Resident
Evil?
No, it’s more along the lines of Amnesia where you have to avoid
confrontation.
Does
your game allow players to interact with objects in the environment and
background?
Yes. Objects that
appear in color are things the player can interact with. We chose this in order
to prevent having to add UI elements for button prompts, which can break immersion.
What
are the main themes behind the game? (I noticed that you have a shot of someone
writing "God, why have you forsaken me?") Is your game biblical
themed?
The game is inspired by my experience suffering from
obsessive-compulsive disorder and depression, and I am trying to recreate those
feelings in the nightmares of Adam. That particular bible quote seemed quite
powerful at expressing complete and utter emotional desolation, which reflects
how depression can feel like.
Is
this more of a psychological game where the events and monsters reflect the
character's psychological issues?
Yes, since the game takes place in nightmares, everything can be
symbols for explaining more about the character’s psychological state.
What
is with the vivid images of pulling out arteries and breaking off bones? Is
that a puzzle?
Those are intrusive thoughts that I’ve
struggled with because of my obsessive-compulsive disorder. One of the most
difficult things I’ve struggled with is intrusive thoughts of violent
self-harm. Because of mental illness, my mind constantly invents new and
terrible ways of self-injury in order to torment me. I am trying to recreate
those thoughts in the game because they are truly horrifying.
Are there any games,
books or movies that influenced this game? (For example: games like Resident
Evil, authors like Stephen King, movies like Halloween)
The Silent Hill series as well as
Amnesia are the games that had the most influence on Neverending Nightmares.
I’ve also been heavily influenced by the movie “The Shining”, which is the
perfect horror film.
What kind of
game style influenced your game? (Like Resident Evil's survivor gameplay or Amnesia's
hide and escape gameplay)
Amnesia’s hide and escape gameplay
was a big influence. We love the feeling of vulnerability you get when you are
unable to engage the enemies.
Do you often play
games? If so, what kind of games do you play?
I do play games, but not as often as
I would like. I’ve been playing a lot of horror games lately to get more ideas
of what works and what doesn’t. I also especially enjoy playing co-op games
with my wife, and we’ve been playing Rayman Legends.
What kind of games
did you grow up with? What games influenced you the most and why?
I mostly gamed on Nintendo and Super
Nintendo. The Mario games were the biggest influence just because they had
these big and amazing worlds. I sometimes go back and play the original Mario
games, and I am still quite impressed with what they accomplished given the
limitations of the hardware.
How did you get into
game design? College? Club? Friends?
I’m not really sure. I started
learning to program at 9 because I wanted to make games. I haven’t stopped
making them since!
What do you like to
work on in games?
I like to do it all except art
because I’m really bad at that.
The art style that influences me the
most depends on the game. We were really inspired by Edward Gorey for
Neverending Nightmares. His work is remarkable because it is like a twisted
children’s storybook. We think that is a great fit for what we are trying to
do.
What makes your game
unique in the gaming world, besides the neat art style?
We are creating something that tries
to capture the experience of battling with mental illness, which I think is
something really unique to do with a game.
What changed as you
were working on this game? Did you already know you were going to have a
character named Adam in a mansion? If not then how did this game start out?
Pretty much everything has been in
flux. I started with an idea of bringing some elements of my nightmares and my
mental illness to life, and the current characters and locations evolved out of
that.
Your game seems
to be set around the 1800-1900s. How did you come up with the setting in
your game? Why this time period and why a mansion?
The setting is something that
evolved to serve the game design needs. The time period was basically chosen so
we could have candles instead of electric lights. With candles, you have to
worry about whether the light will go out, which has an inherent tension that
is really appealing for horror.
A mansion seems creepy – there are a
lot of corners to explore and places for monsters to hide. Fatal Frame and
Resident Evil both took place in mansions and it worked really well.
You said that your
character's name was Adam. Adam can mean "to be red." Is this why you
named him Adam because of the red blood that stands out in the black and
white?
No. I chose the name Adam because of
Adam and Eve. He is supposed to be an everyman – a blank slate. Because you are
only learning about the character through his nightmares, I wanted to choose
something that didn’t imply a particular personality. I was tempted to name him
John, but that is too overused. I thought Adam was similar in effect.
In one scene you have
a woman chasing Adam through a hallway. Is Adam going to be chased or is this a
more of a hiding game?
The game will mostly be about
hiding, but I’m sure there will be some chases.
In another scene you
have a hanged woman opening up her eyes. Are there cutscenes in this game or
are these more interactive moments?
There will be cutscenes, but we
intend to keep them brief. Games are at their best when they are interactive.
You said that you
were basing this game on your own experiences with OCD. Are you using your
game to help you cope with your condition? Or could this game help people
understand people with your condition?
My goal is to create something that
will help people understand what others suffering from mental illness
experience. I have found working on this game to be quite therapeutic, which
was unexpected because I was worried development would dredge up unpleasant
memories.
How long have you had
OCD? Were you diagnosed young or at an older age?
I suspect I’ve suffered from it in
one form or another for my entire life, but I didn’t seek treatment for mental
illness until I was 19.
How do you treat your
condition?
I’ve been in therapy for 12 years
now, so I’ve learned a lot of different techniques as well as tried a variety
of medicines. Right now, I’m only taking medicine for insomnia, and I’ve gotten
my OCD mostly under control with cognitive behavioral therapy.
When making this game
did you always want to base it on your experiences with OCD?
When trying to decide on a game idea
to follow Retro/Grade, I thought about what game I most want to make and what I
would be best at making. Both questions led me to the answer of creating a game
based on my very difficult battle with mental illness.
What made you
decide to take your experiences with OCD and make it into a
game?
I’ve always struggled to communicate
what my experience with OCD is like. Creating a game seemed like the perfect
way to give others that experience.
Do you have an idea
of what you want to do next after you finish this game?
I’d
like to continue to work on horror games that draw on my own personal
experience. I feel that because of because of my struggles, I have an
interesting voice in the horror game genre.
What do you think is
the biggest draw in your game?
I think the biggest draw is the
amazing atmosphere we’ve been able to create with the unique art style, our
lighting system, and the amazing audio.
Neverending Nightmares
is currently in its fundraising stage at Kickstarter.com. You can find more
info about the game at Infinititap Games’ Facebook page or at their website.
Trailer
You can go to
Kickstarter.com to help make this game a reality.
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